As a mom, especially a new mom, it feels like other live to judge you and how you raise your child. They will give you their unwanted advice or critique, pointing out what you are doing ‘wrong’, and make you feel as though you are failing at every aspect of motherhood. Whether you know them or not, everyone seems to have something to say. You can even see the judgment in peoples eyes when you say things like “we co-sleep”, or “they only sleep on their stomach”, and horror of all horrors if you say “breastfeeding didn’t work for us”. You may come home from a simple grocery trip, feeling utterly defeated, and questioning if you are a good mother or not.
You know your baby better than anyone else, and know what works for both of you. Everyones baby is different, and everyone does things differently, and just because you don’t conform to the “norm” or what’s popular, it doesn’t make you a bad mom! And even as your child grows up, the judgmental comments don’t go away, they just evolve with the child. Unfortunately, a lot of the time the judgment comes from other moms, despite knowing how hard motherhood is and how hurtful those kinds of comments are. This kind of judgment may be labled “advice” and may be seen as simply helping another mom, but if the “advice” isn’t received well, the advice giver usually gets offended. It’s okay to to get upset and not listen to others judgments of you! You are an incredible mother who knows what their child needs.Don’t let their comments upset you!
Motherhood is one of the most beautiful experiences that women go through! It is filled with love and magical moments, but it is also incredibly hard. You may find yourself thinking of something that you feel the need to tell another mom, but think twice about it before you pass judgment on a fellow mom. Most of the time it is just best to keep quiet and trust that that other mom is doing a great job and raising her kids as best as she can. Don’t ruin another moms motherhood magic by your flippant judgmental comment, instead, take the time to encourage and uplift that mom. All this being said, I am not saying I am perfect, and in fact I have often caught myself after I have passed judgment on someone else. At the end of the day, we are all just moms, trying to do whats best for our kids, raise them right, keep them alive (haha), and give them all the love in the world!